Why do I get punished with the lightening bolt teeth of Zeus's multi-headed hound of hell chewing stabbing needle holy holes in my toes when all I want to do is sit quietly and watch hours on end of cheesy Hong Kong police movies!? In my Flight of the Conchords t shirt no less.
I get aches and cramps and pains and pulls when attempt to exercise and then I decide to be nice to my poor limbs and joints and cute little extremities and what do I get for my trouble...tickled by a meat tenderizer from the inside by all my tiny nerves, angry at a little loss of blood flow.
I'm reminded of the time, a long time ago, when I used to put rubber bands about my finger tips and toes to watch them turn all shades of purple. If timed just right I could watch the progession of hues along all the top knuckles of my fingers. Those where the days...
Oh yes, I had a neon zebra T shirt that looked almost like that one that I loved and wore all the time. And yes, one of my hands is freakishly larger than the other one. At least it was back then.